Well, saturday was supposed to be a long run. I was going to do the Red, White and Blue shoes 5k and then run another lap around the course. I was excited about my PR, talk about that later, but did not feel like running another 3. So instead, I talked and talked and talked and avoided looking for Holly Di Giovine (which is who I was supposed to run with) and insured that I wouldn't be running :)
But knew I had to make it up which leads me to today. I'm at the beach, Myrtle to be exact, and I woke up on my own at 6:45 am to run, no alarm clock. I was just ready to get it over with so I guess my body was letting me know we weren't oversleeping. I put on my clothes, grabbed my Garmin, and started running. I didn't know where to go because I'm not familiar with this part of the beach so that's why I'm glad I had my trusty watch.
The first part of the run was nice, i started slow because I wanted to make sure I didn't poop out. The first 3 miles went quickly and I really enjoyed it. I felt like I was in a zone and nothing could stop me. Then I started to struggle, mainly because 1) it was hot 2) I was thirsty 3) I had to go to the bathroom and 4) I was hungry. I ran another mile pretty well but then mile 5 and 6 were odd, I had to walk, blah blah.
Here is the biggest difference from other runs where I've struggled, I didn't care. I don't mean that in a bad way like, i don't care about my training... I meant, I didn't have any expectations and i was okay with however it turned out. I hate when I go for a run and it doesn't turn out the way I plan and then I get mad at myself. Why do I judge myself so harshly when I don't run at my expected pace? I think sometimes, I feel slow already so when I do a long run and I'm not at my best, it makes me feel bad about something that already is slow. But I'm getting to a place in my training where I am realizing that it is what it is. And my pace is my pace. I can't help that it's not faster and just like I tell my friends or new runners that it's about being healthy and not about time, I should follow that same advice.
So today was nice because I could enjoy a not so perfect run and know that I just finished my third week of marathon training and I have 17 more weeks.
p.s. I am officially on day 3 of the fitabs challenge and I have done 100 each day... BAM!
Do you ever beat yourself up about your training?