"Keep calm and carry on. Write (and create) your own Keep Calm and Carry On poster. Can you make it about your condition? Then go to (
http://www.keepcalm-o-matic.
This is a simplified version of all of the life lessons I've learned throughout my thirty one (almost thirty two) years I've been alive. I'm trying to figure out the best way to sum up why I've chosen this mantra for today. I really could list all of the experiences I've had that have lead to this conclusion, but that would take FOREVER. So here is my attempt to make it brief and interesting -
All of my life, I have had this quest to be perfect. For whatever reason, I have always had this thought that to make a mistake is completely unacceptable. Having this mindset has helped to set me up for some major disappointments considering I am human and humans make mistakes. The way this seems to have manifested itself into my life over the past several years has been through body image & money.
Body Image -
Here is my cycle when it comes to food/eating - I try to "diet" because I think I need to lose weight (FYI - I have ALWAYS thought I needed to lose weight, no matter what size) because when I lose weight, and I'm at ________(insert number here) lbs, I will be happy. The diet I choose is to difficult to maintain, I cheat on my diet, insert guilty feeling because I can't seem to "control" myself and eat healthy, so I'm destined to be overweight since I can't control myself. I am somehow inherently bad.
Money
Take the paragraph above, remove words with food and diet and replace with money and budget. Remove the word overweight, replace with the word unstable financially.
I am reading this book right now called "It's not about the Money"
So far, I'm in the beginning where it talks about "The Wanting Mind". It says that having a wanting mind has served us through the years because it helps us survive. We are predisposed to "want" things such as a more secure place to live, food, etc. This can also create a sense of dissatisfaction in our lives. This is where the "I'll be happy when I achieve this _____" comes from.
When he started discussing this, I laughed to myself because I can think of so many examples. I told myself when I started saving money that once I achieved a cash savings of 6 months salary, I would feel secure. But when I achieved that goal, which I did do, I thought to myself, "Oh, that must not be right, I really actually need _____ amount". It's the same with weight, job, everything.
How this applies is that, I can never seem to accept my current circumstances and be proud of where I am. Knowing that it's in my genetics to think I should always want more makes me feel a little better about myself, simply because it explains why I'm always feeling that way.
The other piece of this -
I am human. Everyone makes mistakes. When I make a mistake, I don't need to beat myself up about it. I will give you an example. I am one who used to love to gossip. The more I've tried to become a better person, the more I realize that gossiping is not something I want to do. It's hurtful to the person I'm gossiping with and the person I'm gossiping about. So I try very hard not to do it. The other day, I found myself falling into that old habit once again, gossiping about someone and IMMEDIATELY, I realized what I was doing. I apologized to the person and explained, I'm gossiping. I don't want to gossip. I apologize for gossiping. Then, I continued to beat myself up about it for two days. I was talking to another friend about how bad I felt for gossiping and why did I fall back into that old behavior. Then, she mentioned, 1) at least I noticed it in the middle of what I was doing and 2) that I apologized immediately. Can I just notice that's growth because before, I would've just kept gossiping.
I'm going to make mistakes. We all are. That's why we are human. If we were all perfect, nothing would ever be wrong in the world. BUT, if I get up on a daily basis and make a promise to myself that
1 - I'm not going to overreact
and
2 - I'm going to love myself no matter what happens
then I can get through anything.
Namaste, y'all!
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